The Meldrews

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I want Victor Meldrew and Margaret Meldrew to be my parents.

I don’t live close by, but I visit often and they visit me. They’re eccentric but I love them and their house always feels like home. Victor’s very irascibility is stability to me. Margaret doesn’t suffer fools gladly, but she too provides steadiness when I totter or start to spiral. Mrs Warboys is a fond godmother to me. I usually see her only when she happens to be visiting my parents at the same time, but a few times a year she phones and invites me to dinner just the two of us. At first, I thought that Mr Swainey was a creep, but I think I understand him now.

My parents are old-fashioned, but I like that. I hope they never change.

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